Distance Runner

No I am not training for a marathon. I don't get women who continue to work out into their third trimester (Gisele Bundchen). I walk every day and can even swim a bit, but running and kick boxing??? No its not possible. Even pregnancy yoga is kind of a joke it takes like 5 min to get into a position, 5 min to hold, and another 5 to get out. So unless you are doing hours of the stuff its really more for stretching then working out. No "Distance Runner" is a metaphor.

I went to school today. In case you didn't know I am a teacher who has been on medical leave for 4 months. I am hoping to go back this coming Monday and I wanted to pick some stuff up to get myself ready. Today was mostly fine. I was tired when I got home, but otherwise I was physically fine. I will only have 4 classes when I come back (seniors will have graduated). My first period will be left with like 6 kids. I am a little worried about my 5th period which is filled with rowdy 9th graders but I think I can handle it for a month. My second period is going to be a night mare. As far as I can tell they have done nothing but play games for 4 months. I'm not going to bash my sub on the internet, but it just wasn't a great situation. Its not entirely his fault. There is no one qualified to teach my engineering classes. But I don't know how I am going to re-chain leviathan.

Emotionally, going back was another story. 99.9% of the people I spoke to today felt the need to tell me how much things fell apart without me. How was that supposed to make me feel? I think most of them were trying to make me feel needed, but it translated into guilt. Its not like I have been on a pleasure cruise for 4 months. It was not my choice to sit at home in bed. For months I agonized over what I was leaving behind. The stress did physical damage to my health. I had finally got over it only to come back and have it rubbed in my face. Which brings me back to my running metaphor.

This weekend my pastor preached about endurance. He said you don't learn to be patient by laying in a hammock reading a book. You learn by suffering day in and day out and enduring it. Every obstacle we face in life presents us with an opportunity to endure and overcome. It is not the destination that matters but the journey itself. Life is not a 5k it is a marathon. Speed doesn't matter, endurance does.

I truly believe that all of this has happened to me to teach me humility. I've been brought to my knees to be humbled by all that lay before me. In all of my professional career I have never once put my family first. Now, nothing is more important to me. You can't always make lemonade when life hands you lemons. But you can learn to tolerate them. I intend to go back, take my punches, and keep running. I'm just running in a different direction now and at a different pace. Learning to accept that I am now in the 10 min mile group and not the 6 is probably the most important lesson I have ever learned.