Craft Fare

My allergies are acting up again and I can't breathe even more then usual, so I can't sleep, so it is time to blog...

Being confined to the house again sucks. I get out a few times a week to go dinner or my parents but I have to remain seated (which I don't do well). Once a week Pat takes me to the grocery store and I can last about an hour. Other days I can't even walk to the mail box without feeling like the baby is going to fall out of me. At least I am home. But now we are back to filling up time. I think I have now watched every episode of Top Model, which I don't even like. I have been obsessively playing the Pawn Stars Facebook game, which has been down for the whole weekend, grrrr. What to do? What to do?

Having completed 3 baby blankets, I am now crocheting a big fluffy white one for Scarlett. But that is more like a 2 month project rather then a 3 week one. My goal is to be done by the time she is born. Provided of course that she keeps on cooking. Side note: Pat decided he was going to get in shape before baby makes her appearance. So as I am becoming more hippo like he is getting all buff and skinny. Damn him. He has 10 lbs to go to get back to his pre-wedding weight. He'll surely make it. Do you know how long it takes woman to loose 10 lbs?

Back to the point. A 2 month project is not as satisfying. I like instant gratification. So I went to Michaels one day got a bunch of fake flowers, feathers, and rhinestones and starting making baby hair bows. People seemed to like them so I decided to put some up for sale on Etsy. To visit my store click here. I have no real expectations of selling things but it only costs $0.20 to list an item and it gives me an excuse to make more. If you have never visited this site before stop reading and go check it out. Their motto is "Your place to buy and sell all things handmade, vintage, and supplies." I have spent hours trolling this site looking at all the cleverness that is out there. For example, my friend Jesse, makes these sweet belt buckles and jewelry from old skate boards. Check out Deckhand Designs. I recently bought a diaper caddy in a Dr. Seuss print that I am really excited about. Search Dr. Seuss and you could browse for days and days.

Anyway after perusing around for hours I got inspired to make decorated wipe cases. Pat came downstairs and looked at my like I was crazy. What on earth is the point of having a pretty case for something that is going to be used on a baby's butt? But it kept me busy for at least 2 hours. I've also been inspired to make Dr. Seuss themed letters for the nursery and possibly a tutu or two. I'm making Pat take me back to Michaels tomorrow. This could keep me occupied for months...

A Hairy Situation

Status update: much as predicted, wait and we'll see is the doctor's orders. I saw the midwife on Friday and she said that the contractions caused the baby to move down low and her head is pushing down on my cervix. So I have to go back on bed rest, well modified bed rest, which means I can sit on the couch rather than in bed. I can go out occasionally but I learned over the weekend that if I stand for too long I feel like she is going to fall out and it really hurts. Basically I am to stay off my feet so gravity doesn't do its part in making this baby come early. I have to wear the stupid belly band all the time becuase it will "encourage" her not to go to low. I go back in two weeks and they will re-evaluate.

I think I got a single month of peace. In addition to being "stuck in place" again, I have terrible heart burn and I can't breathe. My diet is restricted again and sleeping is a thing of the past. It is really depressing. I know last week I was all flustered about going back to work but I was really looking forward to getting something of normalcy back. I really want to be a member of society again. I went to a HOA meeting last night and it was the first time I ever enjoyed a meeting. I sit on the board and people fight and there is no pleasing anyone and usually it sucks. Last night I got a real high from it becuase I think it was the first time I have done something productive in like 6 months. But then I came home and felt like crap. I'm starting to realize if I don't do what they tell me I really am going to have this baby 10 weeks early. *Sigh* Pat made me pack my hospital bag "just in case." It is so surreal. This morning I was looking at my ginormous hippo belly in the mirror and I thought "huh, I am pregnant." You'd think I would have accepted that by now.

There is a silver lining here though. I had an ultrasound yesterday. I can report the following: She is in fact head down and very low but she is very active (surprise, surprise) which is apparently a very good sign at this point in the pregnancy. We saw her playing with her hands and yawning. That was very cool. Her organs are all intact and functioning properly. Oh and she has hair. Yes, hair. I can't believe they can tell that on a sonogram but you can, they printed me a picture and sure enough she has hair. Also, according tot he ultrasound tech she is going to be cute. I don't know how she knows that. She does seem to have a cute little nose, but generally speaking newborns are not cute they are kind of creepy looking.

I was very happy to see her yesterday. After all the drama from last week it was reassuring. She actually seemed like a little person and not just an alien. I think I may have teared up a bit when I saw her yawn. Pat is starting to get really excited. He has been pretty nervous but after seeing her yesterday he can't wait to meet her. I am getting teary eyed just thinking about it. Hormones are stupid...At this point all I want to do is hold her in my arms, but not for another 10 weeks, so stay put child!

A Trip to Labor and Delivery

About 36 hours ago I started to feel really terrible. Exacerbated by watching Due Date (that is 2 hours of my life I will never get back). I started throwing up and having other digestive issues. On top of that my back and belly were even more sore then usual. I got no sleep, I just felt wrong. I also have been having a lot of trouble breathing. Part of it, as I mentioned in a previous post, is that my diaphragm is being compressed by uterus. But I also found out on Tuesday that I am anemic from being malnourished for 5 months and that is also contributing to my shortness of breath.

So I got maybe 3 hours of sleep that night and woke up feeling horrible still. I said to my mom I feel like I have the flu. She asked what my symptoms were and I listed the aforementioned and I said my belly is really hard and there is a lot of pressure on my cervix. I realized I was having contractions but I wasn't sure if they were Braxton Hicks, false labor, or the real deal. She says well that could be the flu but it also sounds a lot like premature labor symptoms so I should call the doctor. So I say well I'll wait and hour and see if I feel better, but it occurred to me that the flu wouldn't go away in an hour so I call the doctor. They say come in and don't drive yourself. Of course Pat was in a meeting, mom was at school, and my sister, as usually, was not answering her phone. So I called my friend Mike who instantly came and picked me up (Thanks!!!).

They saw me right away at the doctors, did like a 3 min examination and said go over to the hospital...??? I had sent Mike home thinking I would be at the doctors forever and I would call him or my sister to pick me up later. Fortunately the doctors office is across the street from the hospital and I had brought an umbrella becuase it was raining cats and dogs! I called my mom at school scared out of my mind. And I felt like the bay was going to fall out of me on the walk over. I wondered into the lobby and asked them where labor and delivery was, I felt really stupid. They ask me are you visiting? No, but I might be having a baby. Oh well are we expecting you? Yeah, in two months...

So I have to say props to L&D at HCGH they were quick to see me and very nice. My doctor's office always has a doctor and a midwife in the hospital so they took care of me right away. I was really scared at first and alone but the nurses were very sweet and they told me not to freak out too much and the doctors always send women having contractions over "just in case" rather then doing a complete assessment in the office. That made me feel much better. Wasn't too long before mom showed up. (I need to say thanks to Hunter, my sister's 20 year old bf, who was next door at school working on a like 10 hour engineering practical but said he would come over to be with me if I needed him).

Good news: I did not have a baby. I'm not going to get into all the gory details but basically I had a stomach bug and I became really dehydrated and that caused the contractions. They gave me zofram for the nausea and gave me fluids intravenously and the contracts stopped. Fortunately she is suborn and stayed way up high and refused to come down and be born. Good job Scarlett. Side note, even the L&D nurses were really impressed by her inability to sit still. They had trouble with the contraction monitor and the heartbeat monitor becuase she kept squirming about and moving them.

Bad news: I still feel like crap and I am back on the BRAT diet. I'm so hungry...I was finally able to eat and now its jello and saltines again. Contractions are painful, and I am told they will be worse when I actually go into labor. I feel like I did 1,000 sit-ups last night. I'm also confined to the bed and couch for a few days. As for going back to work next week, who knows. I go back to the doctor on Friday and they will make a decision then, though I fear the decision will be come back in a week and we'll see.

Now the whining. I'm so tired of this. There was a brief moment yesterday when I thought, well at least it might be over. It was brief though. I am glad she is still in there cooking, its just hard. I'm tired of feeling like crap, I am tired of feeling overwhelmed and I am tired of feeling like a failure. I know none of this is my fault, but it feels like I can't get anything right. I can't work, I can't seem to grow a baby properly, and I can't be a good friend, daughter, sister or wife right now either. A friend posted this on my FB today "I promise it's worth it. The first time she smiles at you will make everything else melt away." I am going to end with that, becuase it is more beautiful then anything I can dream up.

Distance Runner

No I am not training for a marathon. I don't get women who continue to work out into their third trimester (Gisele Bundchen). I walk every day and can even swim a bit, but running and kick boxing??? No its not possible. Even pregnancy yoga is kind of a joke it takes like 5 min to get into a position, 5 min to hold, and another 5 to get out. So unless you are doing hours of the stuff its really more for stretching then working out. No "Distance Runner" is a metaphor.

I went to school today. In case you didn't know I am a teacher who has been on medical leave for 4 months. I am hoping to go back this coming Monday and I wanted to pick some stuff up to get myself ready. Today was mostly fine. I was tired when I got home, but otherwise I was physically fine. I will only have 4 classes when I come back (seniors will have graduated). My first period will be left with like 6 kids. I am a little worried about my 5th period which is filled with rowdy 9th graders but I think I can handle it for a month. My second period is going to be a night mare. As far as I can tell they have done nothing but play games for 4 months. I'm not going to bash my sub on the internet, but it just wasn't a great situation. Its not entirely his fault. There is no one qualified to teach my engineering classes. But I don't know how I am going to re-chain leviathan.

Emotionally, going back was another story. 99.9% of the people I spoke to today felt the need to tell me how much things fell apart without me. How was that supposed to make me feel? I think most of them were trying to make me feel needed, but it translated into guilt. Its not like I have been on a pleasure cruise for 4 months. It was not my choice to sit at home in bed. For months I agonized over what I was leaving behind. The stress did physical damage to my health. I had finally got over it only to come back and have it rubbed in my face. Which brings me back to my running metaphor.

This weekend my pastor preached about endurance. He said you don't learn to be patient by laying in a hammock reading a book. You learn by suffering day in and day out and enduring it. Every obstacle we face in life presents us with an opportunity to endure and overcome. It is not the destination that matters but the journey itself. Life is not a 5k it is a marathon. Speed doesn't matter, endurance does.

I truly believe that all of this has happened to me to teach me humility. I've been brought to my knees to be humbled by all that lay before me. In all of my professional career I have never once put my family first. Now, nothing is more important to me. You can't always make lemonade when life hands you lemons. But you can learn to tolerate them. I intend to go back, take my punches, and keep running. I'm just running in a different direction now and at a different pace. Learning to accept that I am now in the 10 min mile group and not the 6 is probably the most important lesson I have ever learned.

Update on Baby Stuff

First some addendum to make:

1. The cheapest way to buy diapers is an Amazon subscription. Pampers has the best deal. Basically you get 30% off by subscribing, meaning they ship them to your house, no shipping fees, at any interval you wish. They email you before they ship them so you can change the size and you can cancel at any time. Target's brand, which people seem to love, is around the same price depending on the size. However, the Target is 20 min from my house and my front door is two steps, 10 if I am upstairs. Gas is about 4.00/gallon these days so I like those numbers. Wipes are about the same deal. Target brand is about the same price as the subscription but we have determined I am lazy and want to save on gas.

2. Formula is hella expensive. Too bad I can't breast feed but I can't so there is no use in crying over spilt milk (no pun intended Super Pat). The word is that store brand is exactly the same as the name brand. Target, Walmart, and Costco all run about $0.50/oz (for powder and it takes one scoops of powder to make 2 oz of milk) and the name brands are $1/oz. Holy crap that is a big difference. They say you can get a ton of coupons for the name brands but if you don't have one...seems like a no brainer. I'd prefer to use Costco's. You can buy it in bulk in the store and the store is 5 min away. But reviews say it is foamy when you first mix it and have to let it settle. Sounds like a lot of work to me. Wal-Mart's brand has mostly really good reviews, but a few people say it smells, stains clothes, and sometimes the powders is chunky. But Wal-Mart is so close and we have a Super Wal-Mart and that is where we grocery shop. Maybe I'll ask Pat what he thinks about it (novel idea, no?). I know lots of people who use Target's and they all seem fine. But again it is 20 min away and I don't go there often. You can buy it online in bulk with free shipping. But Target has a terrible return policy. Not that I plan on doing a lot of returning in the formula department but formula is one of those things that some babies have problems with certain brands. Target's is supposed to be the same as Enfamil and Wal-Mart is supposed to be the same as Similac. So maybe I will buy a few of the individual cans at Target and if it is a problem I will return them and try Wal-Marts...or maybe I should do it the other way around. Oh and one more thing, it does not pay to buy formula in bulk. No Amazon subscription. Which leads one to believe that formula is very expensive to make and the profit margin is not very large. Alas.

3. Trip says he likes the diaper warmer. He has like a two week old and says cold bottoms at 3 Am are not cool (again with the pun). But I am not convinced.

4. I checked out my friend's Graco Meal Time High Chair. She seems to like it and the tray does not seem too difficult to get on and off. But she def puts him in and pulls him out without removing the tray. She likes it becuase the cover is machine washable and it folds up nicely. However, the seat is in permanently reclined back slightly, good younger babies, bad for older ones. Its also $70, $60 less then the one I chose. I could almost buy two for that price, but it only comes in brown, green, baby blue, and pink. I still like the Joovy better.

Now some updates on my baby stuff acquisitions:

I have been hitting up the yard sales pretty hard. If any one knows of some coming up, holler. I have acquired the following: 3 baby bouncers ranging from $5-15 in price, a glider for $25 (the padding has taken a beating and the fabric is worn but these retail at $150, so at $25 it is both extraordinarily comfortable and pretty), two jersey sheets for $5, 3 receiving blankets for $4, a brand new Dr. Brown's microwave sterilizer with two bottles for $5!!!, formula mixing pitcher for $3, a car bottle warmer (none of these work well so I am glad I got one cheap) for $3, and a bunch of clothes...oh the clothes.

When I got the test results back that she didn't have a major genetic disorder I went shopping. It was therapeutic and made me feel excited to be pregnant for the first time. I got a bunch of cute outfits from the Carter's outlet. Big mistake. At yard sales you can get basically all baby clothes for $0.25 a piece. Little babies only wear clothes for such a short period of time that they don't destroy them. Now I have too many and have to skip over this fabulous part of yard sales. Consignment stores and big Mom2Mom sales have clothes ranging from $4-8. Not a great deal but I admit I have bought some of these too. Early on I also bought some used clothes on ebay. Why did I do this? They averaged out to be about $1 each, including shipping and handling but I threw out 3 or 4 becuase of the condition. That is what you get for not seeing the product first. In addition to the clothes I bought. Mike gave me a huge box of hand-me-downs he got from some friend of his. In a million years she could not wear all of them. BTW all of these clothes are 0-6. That could conceivably only last 3 months. I'm hoping to get some more hand-me-downs in the larger sizes. Oh and I will surely get more tiny clothes at my shower.

I have also gotten some cool toys. I don't want a million toys. I have one closet and two storage cubs she can keep them in. Any more then that will go straight to grandmas. I bought this cool dinosaur ball thing for $10. I don't really know how to explain it. You put a ball in one of the holes it lights up, makes noises and then rolls down its neck or tail or through the leg. Sounds kind of creepy but it is really cool. My pekingese agrees. I also got this cool vtech toy, which retail for ridiculous prices, that has 3 parts. First its got this piano/car dashboard (weird combo right?) that makes noises and has buttons and leavers. The baby can play with this on the floor. Then when she is bigger it has a stand so she can stand up and play with it. Finally that stand has wheels so she can push it around. Another $10. Good stuff. She now needs no more toys.

I have also "won" some stuff on ebay (I am including shipping prices). A breathable bumper for $20 which retails at $30. I found out the next week I could have borrowed a friends. I got an itzbeen for $15, retails for $25-30, a Dr. Brown's bottle warmer for $20, retails $40, a boppy for $10, and a softer cover for $10, together retail would be $40+. Ugh I admit I got into a bidding war today for 3 8oz Playtex Drop-In bottles, two new (no box) and 1 used. I paid $11.95, new 12.99. What a shame. I have tried several times to get a Moby wrap but I am only willing to go up to $30 since they retail for $40. I keep loosing to people who seem to be willing to go up to $35 plus shipping...?

Once Upon a Time is a great second hand store with two locations near me. I got a really nice Carter's Swing for $55, retails at $175. It is in perfect condition. I also got one of those leapfrog interactive tables for like $15 which the kids at church seem to love so that is exciting. They also have a lot of new clothes at discount prices. I also got a swaddle me, its pink leopard print. Pat rolled his eyes.

One day I was managing my registry and noticed that Amazon had a Rainforest Activity Mat for $35, plus $8 shipping. I immediately bought it since they retail at $70. After I bought it I realized the vendor had a terrible rating. Upon investigating this person was reviewed as selling not new items. Sure enough mine came in this terrible packaging, without the original box and it was slightly stained, one of the leaves won't come off and had fur on it. I contacted the seller. I got no response. I filed a claim. Yay Amazon, they refunded all of my money. I'd have been really pissed if they hadn't though. When one buys a new item from Amazon they expect it to be new. They seem to know this. Upon rating the seller (Paradise Yardie, DO NOT BUY). She emailed me saying if you thought the thing was so terrible why didn't you return it. Well for one she never contacted me saying to return it and two it would have cost me $30 to ship it back properly. So all in all I am pleased. I got the thing for free.

So far I have gotten a bathtub and a walker lent to me. I still think I am going to get a bumbo, a Bjorn, and a bassinet lent to me as well. We are making great progress.

I get to celebrate Mother's Day?

Today was my first Mother's Day. I hadn't really thought about celebrating it. I feel more like a kangaroo right now then a mother. Though I have started refering to my self as Mommy when I speak to the joey (the proper name for a baby kangaroo) in my pouch. But people kept telling me no you qualify. I'm not very sentimental. I wouldn't have been upset with Pat if he hadn't given me anything. I certainly didn't expect it. But when I came down for breakfast this morning I found a tulips (which remind me of my grandparents) and a card. All sentimental cards are stupid. Honestly what is Hallmark thinking? So its really up to the author to make it special...and it was.

To my mother-to-be,
I love you so very very much. Hope that you enjoy the last Mother's Day that we will spend without our lovely daughter. Next year she will be able to hug you on Mother's Day!
Love, Pat

I can't even type it without crying. I was so emotional about it this morning I couldn't even finish my Special K with freeze dried strawberries (my favorite meal of the day!!!!). We had a nice lunch with the family at the Diamond Back Tavern and they gave roses to all the mothers. I got one too. I guess that makes it official. Of course the pastor was talking about pregnancy this morning...more crying. Then he starts talking about suffering and the contractions start...ugh is it July yet?

Poor pitiful me, I finally am starting to feel better just in time to enter that unbearable part of pregnancy where everything hurts: back, belly, legs, etc. There are no more good night sleeps. There is no comfortable positions. I can't breathe when I lie down (whats that about?). I wake up once an hour to pee (I don't know where its all coming from, I didn't drink a barrel of water). And every time I wake up I am like "oh I don't really need to pee, I'll fall back asleep." Wrong! I don't know why I do that, I know I HAVE to pee. Ugh.

Well all that aside I am still kind of enjoying it. I talk to her. It is kind of weird. I know all women do it, but not being the sentimental type I didn't expect I would. I rub my belly a lot to see where she is and when I find her I pat her. I know its so creepy. When I was at school last week I stopped by a friend's classroom and she came out and asked if she could touch my belly. I said sure! I was shocked. I always assumed I wouldn't be the type to let people touch but apparently I don't mind. I mean she wasn't some random lady in the grocery store but I don't even like hugging people, so the notion that I'd let someone feel my belly is totally strange.

I had another sonogram on Thursday. It went well I guess. She was moving around so much they could barely get a heart beat. But once she turned straight towards the wand and looked right at us! It was both very cool and very creepy. Hi baby! Wait, does she known we're looking at her??? They still couldn't get the measurements off her neck very well but they seemed fairly satisfied with results so I asked, can we not do this every other week any more? How about monthly? No. We need to keep checking to make sure she is not developing abnormally. Ugh (how many ughs is that so far?). I guess no one will ever tell me its just going to be ok. They don't want to get sued. I just want to hold her in my arms and know she is ok. Truthfully, I probably won't really stop being scared till I see her walk and talk and know she really is ok.

A friend of mine had a baby in November and she is the sweetest, cutest, happiest, little thing and I just love her to death. She keeps telling me (Mom not the baby) that I will love mine even more. Its hard to imagine. I can't wait for next Mother's Day...

Seriously, there is a baby in there??

For the first 5 months I really had no emotional attachment to this baby. My life was full of pain and suffering and that is all I associated her with. Well I called her it back then, and then eventually I moved to him. I figured if I got used to the idea of it being a boy (and by I, I mean my mother) then we (she) would be prepared if it was a boy and pleasantly surprised if it was a girl. It wasn't until I found out it was a her and thought I might loose her that I really got attached.

It didn't help when she started kicking me. Early in my fourth month I started to feel her inside me (creepy). At first it is like bubbles and you aren't sure if it is the baby or indigestion. It wasn't long before the bubbles became more painful. It felt like I was being flicked from the inside. Go ahead and flick yourself in the softest part of your belly, now imagine that is happening from the inside...all day long. And she does it ALL day. Not long after that the flicking became full on kicking. Ask a small child to kick you in the stomach and again I encourage you to imagine this is happening from the inside. It really wasn't a pleasant experience. I didn't remember any of my friend's saying this hurt them so I asked the doctor. Since I hadn't gained any weight I didn't have any extra padding so I felt more then usual. Ugh.

This child moves all the time. I mean all the time. I always read about women on the forum who get nervous if they don't feel the baby move for like 12 hours. If Scarlett doesn't move once an hour there is something wrong. One time it was like two hours and I got a little freaked out. Pat says you complain when she kicks you why don't you just enjoy her nap. But I was concerned so I started poking her (what, you didn't do that to your child?). Pat says "you're going to regret that." After 5 mins of poking...BAM, she kicked the crap out of me. I learned that lesson the hard way (and it was really hard, she was clearly irritated). Sometimes she moves herself into a really uncomfortable place, like under my ribs where she will kick them till they are bruised. But I have learned a trick from the pernitologist (that is the fetus doctor). If I gently push her about a bit (push, not poke) I can corral her into a more comfortable position. She has a habit of not being in the position the doctor wants during ultrasounds so he does this. Sometimes this works for him...other times not so much. Once she just kicked the ultrasound wand right off my belly.

It gets super weird when you can start to see this from the outside. I sort of felt like there was an alien about to burst from my belly. Sometimes it is just like a little bump and sometimes it is like a rippling wave. Of course every time I try to show someone or let them feel the baby kicking she stops. Difficult child.

All that being said I realized this morning in the bathtub that it doesn't seem to hurt any more. I think she doesn't have room to kick me any more. At 28 weeks she is the size of a cabbage. I feel her rolling around and she sort of head butts me but the repetitive hard kicking seems to be gone. All of the sudden I actually like it when I can feel her moving about in there. What a notion. Well there was this one time when she did a complete 180 in my belly. OUCH. That was not pleasant. She did not miss one organ on her complete turn around. So somersaults aside we actually have this nice realtionship going on. I find myself even talking to her and rubbing her head ( I know that is super weird). And there she goes...

Baby "Stuff"

So when you have enormous amounts of time on your hands you will do just about anything to fill that time up. And when you are restricted to things you can do on the couch or the bed the computer and tv are pretty much your only friends. Since being home I have watched 12 seasons of Stargate and both movies, 4 seasons of BSG, 2 seasons of Being Human (the good one), 2 seasons of House, most of the Pallisers, and every episode of Man V. Food, Diners, Drive-Troughs, and Dives, and all of Gordan Ramsey's shows. I have played through DA1 twice, ME1 and 2, Oblivion, and a little Culdcept. Yeah I'm a bit of a geek, that maybe understatement. Oh I have also read about 4 Isac Asimovs.

Running out of things to do I started looking for things to read on the internet. You can only read the Washington Post so many times a day...So I joined the July 2011 Baby forum on WhattoExpect.com. People post about 4 things: belly pictures, mother-in-law (MIL) drama, baby shower drama, and stress. Even that only bought me an hour a day.

Have you ever seen "About a Boy"? There is a scene where Hugh Grant's character talks about breaking his day down into 1/2 hour units, becuase he has no job and needs to fill his time. Bed Rest is kind of like that. A typical day might have gone like this: 2 units on baby forum, 6 units searching the web, 2 units reading, 4 units on gchat with Emily, Trip, and Ryan, 8 units watching tv, 2 units sitting out in the sun when it is nice, 4 units (at least) peeing, 8 units sleeping (at best). So that gets us about 18 hours and it still leaves me with 6 hours to fill. I learned to crochet, and have made about 3 blankets in a month, but that is really an activity done during tv time.

But I digress.Then I found out that Dad had signed up for consumerreports.com and thus began the research. I swore I wasn't going to be one of those pregnant women who read all the books and read 1,000 reviews of baby "stuff." I mean isn't a stroller a stroller, and a bottle a bottle? There is totally such a thing as having too much information. But I was really bored. Once I started looking at all this stuff then I started probing all my friends about which products they used, trolling the reviews on amazon.com, etc. I became obsessed and could easily fill my last 12 units up.

If you go to Babies R Us (BRU) they have a list of recommended registry items, its like 20 pages long. Talk about commercialism. My mother and aunt have been constantly astounded with all the products they have come out with to "aide" parenting. For example, they were perplexed by activity gyms and tummy time mats. Apparently 28 years ago you but the baby on a blanket and dangled a toy over their head to get them to look up and roll over. Well that does seem reasonable now doesn't it? Anyways this is the summary of all my research. (Now is a good time to stop reading if you could care less about brands of high chairs)

Bottles: The current registry recommendation is that you register for multiple types of bottles in case the baby doesn't "like" the ones you picked. As far as I can tell from everyone I asked, this was never a problem. As long as you don't give the baby a choice it takes what you give it. Clearly BRU is hoping you'll buy several brands, test them out and then not be able to return them. Good job BRU marketers becuase I know plenty of women who have done exactly that. Ultimately I ended up choosing two types for convince sake. I am going with Dr. Brown's on regular basis becuase everyone I know who did not breast feed (which I will not be able to, due to my many complications) used this brand with success. Down side, they have a crap load of little parts. I have also decided I want to have some Playtex Drop-ins around for traveling and Grandma's house. Hopefully I won't totally screw up my child by occasionally giving her a second type of bottle. I'll let you know if she starves. Of course all modern mothers now seem to need a sterilizer and a bottle warmer as well. I do have to admit that the FirstYears warmer/cooler system is pretty handy. It lets you keep two bottles cold and has a steamer to warm them up. Nice to have in the nursery in the middle of night. Side note: one reason chose these brands is becuase they are longer and they seem easier for me to hold then the short fat ones. However I have a friend who has short fat ones so she can clean them with a regular sponge. This is really a personal preference that should be based on you not the baby...God forbid.

Playards: When my sister was little (21 years ago) she had one of those gray pack and plays that functioned as a portable crib. Now they are all fancy and have changing tables and mobiles and some even have vibrators to soothe the baby. They can also double as a bassinet if you don't want to buy one. I have to admit having one of these on the lower two levels is nice. You have a place to put the baby to sleep and change it on every floor. As for brands I would have been happy to go with the Graco. It comes in every color of the rainbow and is very stable, easy to collapse, and mid range in price ($130). That is the brand most of my friends have, however they have older models that have the nice changing table that folds over. They stopped making them that way in the last year. Now the changing table has to be snapped in place on top of the bed. This is totally inconvenient. Every time I want to change the baby I have to get the changing table out and snap it into place?? I assume I have to do this with a baby in my arms too. Then if I want to put baby to rest in the playard then I need to take the darn thing off again. Also I want to point out that it only snaps in on one side so the baby has a tendency to slide over to one side and isn't all the stable if you ask me. Baby Trend makes a pack and play that has a fold over changing table, with a bonus diaper organizer on the side, but Pat wasn't so thrilled with stability of the whole thing. However, since it was $85 we got one for the basement where the baby would never be left alone in it. This really only leaves us with the Chicco ($170). This is the Rolls Royce of playards, it has a huge mobile, a fold over changing table, a padded bed, and a vibrator/music function with a remote. I did not feel that I needed one this fancy but having ruled out the other brands this is the one we want to go with.

High Chair: This was the most frustrating product of all. As far as I can tell, no one makes the perfect high chair. I think I could make a fortune if I took apart several chairs and put pieces of them into one perfect high chair. The Chicco has some nice features, it has the snap in plastic tray that you can put in the dishwasher, it reclines for bottle feedings, and has variable heights. Seems great. Here is why it sucks, the t-bar (which keeps the baby in place) is attached to the tray, so when you take the tray off you have to hold onto the baby to make sure it doesn't fall out, but I don't see how you can easily do this since it takes two hands to get the tray off. Stupid and potentially dangerous. Also people say the fabric gets kind of messy and is hard to clean...not cool. The Graco has two problems. First it is apparently more difficult then necessary to remove the tray and most people pull the baby out the top. Second reviews say the fabric molds easily becuase it has a lot of crevices that food gets stuck in. Once again Pat vetoed the Baby Trend for not being stable enough. I looked into traditional ones that don't have all the bells in whistles but have sleek simple looks. One is from Ikea, its plastic and seems totally functional, but Pat says its not safe enough. The other which I really like is the Eddie Bower wooden one, not as comfortable for the baby, but very sophisticated looking. However the reviews say it is impossible to clean. I ultimately choose the Joovy. I will admit what drew it to me in the first place is that it comes in black leatherette which of course will fit in perfectly in my house. But I stuck with it becuase that leather is supposed to be easy to clean. In addition it has a tray that with one hand you can unlock and swing out, so you don't have to pull it out. There are two major downsides. The tray is a little too far away from the baby so lots of food gets dropped down there, but from every baby I have seen they smush food down there no matter what. Also the tray is supposed to be dishwasher friendly but doesn't fit in most dishwashers.

Baby Monitor: We choose the Avant Digital becuase the digital has the best signal and doesn't pick up neighbors babies or 97.1. It is the best rated by Consumer Reports.

Diaper Pale: I choose the Diaper Genie II Elite (fancy name no?) becuase my girlfriend has one and it doesn't seem to smell much. The refills for the special trash bags are kind of expensive. The Munchkin one uses regular trash bags which is handy but it doesn't seal each diaper off so it is really just a trash can with some odder control.

Play Gym: Ok so I went through this phase where I wanted all the baby's various accessories to be ocean themed so originally I choose the Einstein's Ocean one. However the reviews say the material is slick and the toys have stickers on them that baby can scratch off and eat. Pretty lame. Also the light up part was on the side not top so it doesn't really encourage baby to roll over. So then I switched to the Einstein's Around the World one which still has sea creatures but then I saw my friend's baby in the Fisher Price Rain forest one. I didn't want this one becuase it has a giraffe with a rainbow coming out of its head. Giraffes don't live in the rain forest. However this little girl was all about the lights, the sounds and the butterflies on the top and she seemed very motivated to turn over so we got that one. My only complaint is that it does not have a pillow for tummy time. So you either "need" a pillow or a separate tummy time mat. I choose the matching Jumperoo becuase they all seemed fairly equal and so it might as well match.

Travel System: Ok so here is the like whopping decision that can totally change your life. So many factors to consider: ease of folding, weight, wheel type (all terrain or walk in the park), car seat compatibility, cup holder, etc. Nearly everyone I know has the Graco System. Why? becuase it is pretty affordable ($150), pretty light weight and it comes with the most popular car seat. I hate the Graco Snug and Ride (the car seat). I find it difficult to get the bar up and down and have bumped many of my friend's children's heads on the the bar. Upon further inspection on Consumer Reports it is rated pretty badly. Everything from ease of use to safety. What is frustrating is the whole system is the best rated...this is infuriating. How can they trash the car seat but recommend the whole system??? I really like the Baby Trend system that has a jogging stroller becuase those are usually more expensive but the car seat, which has a feature I love: A triangular handle that allows you to carry the car seat multiple ways, has bad reviews for a lot of reasons. There is a kind of cool option of having a snap and go which is a stroller that is just a frame and you snap in the car seat and it is super light. You can then pick out some other stroller that you really like and not worry about the whole travel system business. Unfortunately the car seat we want doesn't fit in the snap and go. It also doesn't fit in the very well rated CityMini with the car seat adapter. It would have been easier to pick a different car seat, but we choose the Chicco car seat becuase it is unquestionably the best rated and review car seat. It is the safest for various reasons and easiest to use with its skinner but longer handle and ease of snapping into the base and stroller. I don't know why people buy the Britax, which is twice as expensive, is very safe, but no safer then the Chicco, and not rated well for ease of use. Downsides of the Chicco its expensive and the bases are expensive. A handy modern feature of car seats is you don't buckle the car seat in any more, you have a base that is "permanently" fixed in the car and you can just snap the car seat in and out. Another advantage is that you can get multiple bases so you can easily put baby in mom or dad's car. The Graco base is about $35 and the Chicco is about $75...ouch. The maker's of the Chicco were very clever. It only fits in the Chicco stroller. Which is heavy, expensive and has an umbrella that doesn't have full coverage. People also complain that the adult cup holder isn't deep enough and so they spill their coffee a lot. I don't drink coffee; crisis adverted. Good stuff: its the best stroller for tall people becuase it has adjustable height on the handle. Since Pat is 6'4" and I am 5'4" this is a great feature. The seat folds all the way back for napping and it is easy to snap the car seat in and fold up.

Baby Gate: There are no good baby gates. Well there are some good ones if you are pressure mounting. But you should not pressure mount on stairs and that is all we need it for. We chose the Safety First becuase the devil you know is better then the devil you don't. My mother uses these for the Pekingese at her house. They are ugly and a little difficult to open but I refer you to two sentences ago.

Stuff you don't need to register for but BRU would have you believe you need or need way fewer: A bunch of receiving blankets. These used to be a standard for swaddling babies and other stuff, but I don't know what that stuff is. Now a days you should just get a swaddle me. They function as swaddling blankets but have velcro so baby can't get out of them. Pacifiers; apparently lots of babies won't use them at all so only get one at first to be sure. Child proofing stuff. Ok you need this eventually, but not for like 6 months so why register for it in liu of something you need right away. Wipe warmers: they have a reputation of setting on fire and do you really want to get your child used to having warm ones all the time. They aren't portable so just imagine baby screaming extra at you in a restaurant bathroom becuase its tush is colder then usual. This list could go on and on but I am too tired for it.

Stuff you should buy used: Swings; some babies hate them and they are super expensive. I will admit the Graco one that you can put the car seat in that moves horizontally is nice, but it is really expensive and it of course will not fit a Chicco. Bouncer seats. They are really handy for a place to drop baby in while you shower, do laundry, cook dinner. They are light weight and portable. However they are like $40 a pop and your kid only uses them for 6 months at very best. Go to the consignment shop or yard sale and get a few for $5-15 so you can have one on every level. Bumbo seats; babies use them for like 2 months and they are very costly for 2 months.

I def recommend trolling craig's list, mom2mom sales, yard sales, day care center sales, consignment shops and ebay. People just want to get rid of all this crap when they are done with it so you can get so much stuff cheaply. Since we can't have another one I do not feel the need at all to have fancy brand new for most stuff since we won't be reusing it. That being said there are certain things that you should not buy used. CAR SEATS, you don't know if they were in an accident. I'm not big on stuff that need to be structurally sound such as cribs, jumperoos (though a used exersaucer is probably find), I'm sure there is more but I am tired. Be careful with ebay. Always check the price against Amazon and factor in shipping. With Amazon mom you get free shipping on most baby stuff. It amazes me when people list items for a higher price then retail and add $10 for shipping...

Stuff you need but BRU doesn't seem to be aware of: Wash clothes; ok they recommend you get these but not nearly as many as you'll need. Babies are so messy. Formula mixing pitcher; if you are bottle feeding this thing helps you make a lot of bottles at once. Super handy. Itzbeen; this is not necessary but very handy. It is this little timer thingie that lets records when baby ate, slept, pooped, and a misc. Helps you know the babies schedule and you are supposed to track those things in the beginning and have have seen too many people making some strange chart to do this with. There may be a phone app out there for this but I don't know of it. Organic or jersey crib sheets. The sheets that come with the bedding set are always super not soft. A nightlight, tripping at 2 am, not cool.


Stuff you should not register for becuase people will give them to you anyway: bibs, blankets, toys, shampoo and lotions, and clothes.



Ok I am done, this post went waaaaay longer then I intended...again. Hope this was useful to someone.